How To Deal With Another Woman’s Success
We’ve all been there. Trying our best to be the best, only to realise that there will always be someone who seems to be better, or doing better, than us. We end up comparing ourselves to these women and this can sometimes lead us to become disappointed in ourselves as we feel we have not accomplished as much as they have. Some of us become depressed and want to give up, some of us become green with jealousy and want to knock the other woman down, and then there are some of us who know just how to cheer the other woman along and better themselves while doing so.Here are some tips on how you can support another womans success while trying to build your own.
1) Number one rule! And do not forget this one. Remember that what is meant to be, will be. What is not meant to be, will NOT be, no matter how much you try. There is a plan for every single human being on this earth and a journey that each of us will take. If it wasn’t meant to be, then it would never have happened. So embrace what comes to you (and to her) and remember that it is happening because our Almighty Creator (swt) has allowed it to be this way.
2) When you feel depressed because she seems to be doing something better than you, say a prayer. A good prayer. A prayer for HER. Wishing her success and happiness. This will not only help you to change your mind set about others success, but will also gain you countless rewards. Wishing goodness onto someone else will ultimately bring goodness to YOU which means that you will begin to see your own happiness, insha’Allah.
3) There are some of us who are filled with a nasty jealousy. It begins as a little green monster which builds and builds into a big black ball of hatred. We begin to dislike the woman that seems so successful. We are tempted to post something nasty in an attempt to make people see the same dislike in her that you do. We want to bring her down. This, ladies, is not only immoral, but also seriously sinful. You can fix this way of thinking. Next time you feel even a prick of jealousy towards her, say something nice. Give her your best comment that you could possibly give and try to make her day by doing so. Knowing that you have made her happy will again give you a special feeling of happiness in your soul. Over time, you will feel the burden of jealousy lift off of your shoulders as you strive to better yourself.
4) Remember: “Girls knock each other down, but WOMEN help lift each other up!” I absolutely love this saying. You will never ever be where you want to be if you keep knocking other people down so that you can get to the top. As women, we are meant to empower and help one another. Do not be afraid to help another woman out just because you feel she might steal your spotlight. This is a childish way of thinking and may just come back to bite you in the bum when she surpasses your “success” without you.
5) Whether it be blogging, cooking, being a mom, or working in a law fir, I am sure that we are all, to a certain degree, passionate about what we are doing in our lives. Well ladies, the women that we are so “envious” of, are most likely just as passionate (or even more so) than you are. You need to be able to recognise this passion in her and identify it within yourself. You will realise that you ladies might not be so different after all – which brings me to my next point.
6) If you are able to get to know her personally, then do so. She may be the one person who recognises the passion in you as she has in herself. She may be the one person who helps you reach your goals.
7) Consider the time that it took her to get as far as she has. Perhaps she has been doing this particular thing for over 10 years, and you have only just begun. Chancers are that she had worked hard and struggled to get to where she is over time. Set some goals for yourself to be even further than she is after 10 years BUT BE REALISTIC.
8) Remember that there is nothing wrong with a little healthy competition. It helps you to better yourself and your work.
9) Do not be intimidated and do not give up. If you are doing something you are truly passionate about, giving up will not an option to you no matter how much better others may seem to be. You will never give up even if no body sees your work. She wouldn’t be where she is if she gave up because she was intimated by everyone else.
10) Read the number one rule again. Remember that her success is due to her, just as yours is due to you, insha’Allah!
Jazakallah’khair and thank you ladies for taking your time to read this. If you have any further suggestions on dealing with others success, please comment below. What has worked for you?
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